Love / Hate

It's been a year since the accident and I've now been using a wheelchair now for six months. It's slowly becoming normal that I must use this device every waking hour to get around. It's become both my best friend and my sworn enemy. Much like a relationship, we have good days and bad days together.

Our good days are filled with proper transfers, correct tire positioning, and weight balance. Every obstacle is conquered with grace and smoothness. The days when everything goes right its almost like a well disciplined team.

Our bad days are... Well Bad. When we fight, I always end up loosing. Most of the time, I end up sprawled across the carpet or pavement. The chair, still upright, reminding me who is in charge.

So I have a love hate relationship with this device.

Trust God

May 20

Yesterday was a difficult day for me, it was my little sister Amanda's birthday.

I remember when she was little, teaching her what day her birthday was. May 20th I'd say... her reply was May 20. I always teased her about that, but I never forgot the date of her birthday just based on the way she said it.

I miss you very much Sis. Happy Birthday in heaven and I'll see you up there someday.

Love,

Your Big Brother

Anniversary

Today is the anniversary of the event that forever changed my life's path. Yes, one year ago today I was fighting for my life in a bed in ICU.

How did I spend the day? I spent the day with my family, enjoyed a quiet lunch with my wife, and attended a kindergarden program at Grace Christian. I spent the day with the people I love, the very people I fought so hard to live for.

Thank you everyone who has been a part of my recovery. Everyone who helped make my home accessible, orchestrated and attended the many fundraisers, donated time and/or money, and those who took the time to pray for my recovery. I am truly in your debt for everything you have done.

I could not have made it through this without my loving wife. The woman who affectionately earned the title "Mama Bear" from the staff at the hospital. Thank you honey, for everything you have done. I Love You.

Why am I able to walk in my dreams?

Why am I able to walk in my dreams?

Never once, in any of my dreams, have I been handicapped. It's odd to be able walk and run in my dreams, but unable to do so in reality.

I was once told that dreams are driven by your soul. Evidentially my soul doesn't know that my body is handicapped.

Grace Christian

I have to admit, I thought I would be the last parent in the whole world to send my children to a private school. Isn't that why there is a line item on my property taxes marked school? Angie and I attended public school and we turned out fine. My older two children attended public school and went onto college. What's the difference?

You can tell the difference from the moment you walk in the door. Chances are there will be a student there to greet you at the door. The attitude of these children is amazing. Children of every age are helpful and respectful.

The teachers are very caring and genuinely want the children to excel. The Grace teachers are much more than just teachers. The night of my accident, Alex's preschool teachers drove an hour to sit and pray with Angie in the emergency room. At Grace, our children are much more than just students, they are part of the Grace family.

This all started with Angie and I looking for a preschool for Alex. What we found was more than just a preschool, we found a community that welcomed us in with open arms.

Thank you Grace Christian family, for introducing us to a better education and accepting us into your family.

A Constant Remider

Individual: "You are getting really good in that thing (wheelchair), before long you will forget your even in one"
Me: "Thanks"

What I really wanted to say: I don't really think I'll ever forget that I'm confined to a wheelchair. My whole world is one constant reminder of my situation. Everything I look at and everything I do reminds me of this wheelchair.

I can't really see this as a valid explanation... Visual: me laying on my back at the bottom of a long flight of stairs trying to explain to the people trying to help me get back into my chair... Oh, I'm sorry, I must have forgotten that I'm in a wheelchair.

I lived 36 years with the ability to walk and run, and don't think I'll soon forget that. I'm just praying that this will get easier as time goes by.